Inspiration can come in so many different forms. It can be a song lyric, an inspirational quote, a meaningful picture, an interesting podcast, the stories of our peers, or simply hearing “you’ve got this,” “you’re doing awesome” or “you’re a great mom!” When we are inspired, we move from our worries to a place of empowerment. It’s amazing how powerful great inspiration can be.
Every woman wonders how they will be as a mom, we often set ourselves up with expectations and dreams of an idolized motherhood. So, why do we aspire for perfection? Instead of expecting perfection, we need powerful inspiration that reminds us just how perfect our individual methods can be. With motherhood, we always seem to be told that it will be a natural or instant transformation. But, is it? Is every woman made to be a mother on Day 1? Is it learned, or do we grow into the role? Let’s address this.
The combination of societal pressures and our own beliefs create patterns that we repeat and leave us feeling less than or failures at mothering. Look at how Society portrays mothers. There are generally 2 types. The overbearing, control seeking, perfectionist type or the hot mess, overwhelmed guilt-driven types. You either fall into one or the other and they set us to disapprove of each other. We see these archetypes portrayed in movies, books, or TV series. These stereotypes are ingrained in us and we step into these roles with little or no awareness then wonder why we feel lost.
It’s possible that if we realize motherhood is not a job, we can take the pressure of perfection off the table. When a mother can stand up and say… “Hey, I’m not the motherly type,” while still being a GREAT mom. This attitude exudes self-respect and confidence. This woman didn’t grow up babysitting or have hours of practice holding a baby (this is more common than you think!), but she still loves her child completely. She doesn’t pretend to know it all or pretend to be someone she’s not. Instead, she does what she can do: outsource to get help and stay as true to herself as possible.
To the moms that wear motherhood as a crown we can cheer them on as well. These are the moms that played house and babysat all through their teenage years. They bake for bake sales not to “show off” but because they truly enjoy being in the kitchen and nourishing others. This woman exudes self-confidence and confidence just like the first mom. The problem is that society plays us against each other instead of allowing us to celebrate our unique approaches.
Allowing mothers to see each other as inspiration and resources instead of reflections that we are not would allow mothers to grow. Imagine mothers working together instead of judging each other? By offering new role models that inspire and support these ideals we could effect positive changes in how society portrays us.
We are all human. Let’s all acknowledge this. I’m human and I make mistakes. Staying humble about our humanity teaches our children life lessons such as give and take. Mothers are there to be the guide, supporter, and mentor instead of an easy best friend. With that kind of guidance, children develop into whole, interesting beings capable of critical thinking and creativity. With that said, not every mother is born with all this insight. These goals come easily for some, but for most it is a transition. It is hard and it is something we work at every single day.
Maybe we need to hear “choose you” more often. It may be that simple.
Another lesson in motherly self-care is related to the vast world of Social Media. Let’s talk about a Social Media FAST. Basic human psychology tells us that when we start to compare ourselves to others, it’s time to take a break and choose the healthier option. Comparison is truly the thief of joy, so don’t let yourself get sucked into a destructive and judgmental cycle. There are some really positive things about social media; feeling connected to a group, reading inspirational quotes, seeing a funny video to makes you laugh, etc. But, if you aren’t feeling good about it, get off for awhile and then invite yourself back when you are ready. Delete toxic people or groups and surround yourself with inspiration and motivation! Sometimes, nothing is more empowering than saying “No” to looking at social media that doesn’t inspire you.
We are living through an incredibly isolating time. Our daily lives are being challenged in totally new ways both big and small. Let the power of positive thinking come over you in the hardest times and realize that inspiration is the key to getting through the thick of it. Find that inspiration in whatever moves you and remember to take care of you! Your children will never know all your tricks, but they’ll benefit from the positive energy!
This article was written by Mary McConville, Founder of Growupbrite and Lindsay Bell, Founder of Bell Family Company. Follow us for inspirational and motivational podcasts, articles, virtual retreats and more!
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