One thing that never goes out of style … manners. In an article published by Dana’s Kids, they talk about how building manners is like building muscles. The more you use them, the more they grow.
So how do parents instill manners in their children? The article goes on to explore four different methods:
Model. Model. Model. It doesn’t matter how much you nag your child about remembering to use respectful language, nothing will ever replace modeling. Your child hearing you say “please” and “thank you” will be the cornerstone of their learning to do the same.
Set them up for success. This conversation will look different depending on your child’s age, but you can help your children think about what to do in a variety of scenarios where manners matter prior to that event. Heading to an outdoor holiday event? On the way, talk to you child about three good rules to remember when being with family or receiving a gift.
Allow for variation. Depending on your child’s age, developmental ability and temperament, verbal manners may be more challenging. Think together about other ways to acknowledge people around you. A high five (or elbow bump these days), wave, or a thumbs up and big smile might be a starting point for your child.
Repetition. Building manners is like building muscles. The more you use them, the more they grow.
For the full article from Dana’s Kids, click here.
As the oldest of five girls – with three of us having children of our own – it’s interesting to see how different we parent our children. Based on the descriptions below, we are each a combination of different styles. How can that be when we were all raised by the same parents in the same house? Well, as pandemic fatigue sits in, we as parents are losing our patience quicker than usual or just giving in. As a result, it’s causing us to switch our parenting style.
The four types of parenting styles are:
Authoritarian or Disciplinarian
- Parents use a strict discipline style with little negotiation; punishment is common
- Communication is mostly one way (from parent to child); rules usually are not explained
- Parents with this style are typically less nurturing
- Expectations are high with limited flexibility
Permissive or Indulgent
- Parent discipline style is the opposite of strict; there are limited or no rules; children are expected to figure out problems on their own
- Communication is open, but parents let children decide for themselves rather than giving direction
- Parents tend to be warm and nurturing
- Expectations are typically minimal or not set by these parents
- Parents give children a lot of freedom and generally stay out of their way
- No particular discipline style is utilized; lets the child(ren) mostly do what they want
- Communication is limited
- This group of parents offers little nurturing
- There are few or no expectations of children
- Parents are reasonable and nurturing, and set high, clear expectations
- Children with parents who demonstrate this style tend to be self-disciplined and think for themselves
- Disciplinary rules are clear and the reasons behind them are explained
- Communication is frequent and appropriate to the child’s level of understanding
- Authoritative parents are nurturing
- Expectations and goals are high but stated clearly; children may have input into goals